"We know that in a city like San Francisco, residents deserve hard-hitting investigative reporting to protect the interests of the people," said the editors, "That's why we're 'meowing out' and changing our focus officially - making your click bait our new cat nip. We think there's so many cat stories out there and we want to bring those to the people of San Francisco."
SF voters have preemptively ended their dream of having a single honest city official, and opted to screen each one by asking "In what way are you corrupt?" in all standard candidate questionairres. Answers will be scored from 1 to 10, with 1 being a basic campaign finance violation of $10k or less and 10 being setting up a non-profit to launder funds to portly city officials who like to eat. The scale is adjustable - and can go to 100 at least - depending on future FBI complaints, next week's papers and/or Medium.com blog posts.

Comments
Post a Comment